hummmmm

I am super tired. Went out last night and got home about midnight but dog was ready to play... play and cry and whine and flop for the next 6 hours. I slept out in the living room for the first 3 hrs, just so he wouldn't feel abandoned but then continued to get up repeatedly to let him outside or get him food or yell at him for crying and howling when I was trying to go back to sleep. I think I did sleep between 2 and 330 but that was it. I didn't sleep much the night before either and had been up for 21 hours. So today I've been humming, sleepy, dizzy, dopey, giggly, etc. etc. you know all the seven dwarves. Ridiculous, so 6pm won't get here soon enough for me. And driving will kind of be scary.

Well, that is all I can think of to share right now. Keep me in your thoughts tomorrow morning as I have my annual review, I'm sure it won't be as glowing and stellar as last years. (we get evaluated by all of our peers/those I work for and with and then my manager goes over all of the data collected and tells me what she thinks regarding how I am doing and what I can do better and what my plans for this upcoming year are) And I will honestly tell her that I don't see myself being here over the next full year. Unless, I just keep that information to myself like a good chicken should.

*sniff*

I went to bed around 11pm, couldn't breath through the ol' schnoz (still miserably ill) so it took a while to fall asleep. Puppy woke me at 1am for a outside break.(thank you) I woke up at 430am jostled by the fact that I had to leave for work at 5am and needed to take the dog out, get dressed, make breakfast and lunch for the day, warm up the car and as I am rushing around to start this, the animal starts making horking noises so I drag him off the carpet and try to drag him outside but to no avail he threw up all down the hall and got away and proceeded to ralph in the kitchen, dining room and living room. Cleaning up puke was not what I wanted to add to my morning list of to-do's and he didn't want to go outside so I left him in the house and figured the huz could take him out when he arrived home from work around 730am. Bad judgement, the dog ended up getting sick at the other end of his body all over my carpeted stairs to the basement. Welcome home Dan.

Yes this was the start of my day. I had to be at work @ 6am and have been bustling, hustling around, taking care of stuff that other people should have taken care of weeks ago. We had a huge unit conference and facilities didn't set it up correctly nor did A/V show up on time and i had to put the laptop, data-projector and Video camera all together in 2 minutes for the first lecture, so I ended up moving tables and chairs and then facilities called me and bawled me out for doing that and told me that I needed to stay at work until the conference was over and put the room back how I found it. The conference doesn't end until 6pm.
Do you think I'm really going to stay when facilities didn't have the room set up correctly in the first place? yeah---no! Then a few minutes later one the supervisors asked me to round up some handouts and make 30 copies of the packet for the next session in 20 minutes...HELLO! We were both here yesterday! Is there a reason she couldn't have given this to me yesterday? They have had this thing planned for 4 months and I am making copies 20 minutes before the lecture? NOT HAPPY!

Incidently, I put in two applications for other jobs last night. Cross your fingers for me. I don't think it will be much longer until I go postal. Not to mention that I have my annual review friday morning...wow, what timing!

Yes I survived but not unscathed

You see, there was only one incident where bodily harm was inflicted as I picked the 5 yr old up by his shoulders over a gate to put him in time out for jumping on his 2 year old sister's back and stomping on her hand. His parents understood and I left no marks on his body, nor did he wince in pain. But he did ball knowing that I was upset and he had done something very wrong.

But to help matters over the weekend by Friday evening I had come down with a irritating cold, mostly sniffling, sorethroat and ear-aches which made for irritable impatience with everything. Let's just say I told the mother, my friend, that I would never take her kids again. Which as much as I said it seriously she decided to take it as a joke. PEOPLE!

So this week I am reduced to a mouth-breather. Which disgusts me. Every time I look down-my nose pours, my ears pop when I swallow or yawn or cough or sneeze and the pressure keeps changing in my head which kills my ears. And I look and feel as though there is cotton stuffed behind my eyes and in my sinuses. yep, real pretty. And I like to pride myself on not being a mouth-breather, not chewing with my mouth open, not sniffling in public, in general not being gross. But this STUPID cold is making a mockery of my good habits. Plus my 'N's sound like 'D's and my 'M's sound like 'B's, I sound dumb and my voice is kind of whacked, crackly and every now and then I say something and no sound comes out. I love that.

Ok this probably sounds like whining, but it's not. It's just a description of Tuesday morning taryn. So, we will see if I see any of you this week. Have a great day!

shouldn't this be a happy day?

being that its friday and all? Well, I let myself get taken advantage of again. And like always, when friends don't plan ahead it it's taryn to the rescue. Costing me vacation time and $ and patience. And we wonder why I don't want to spend more time with this friend and all her kids. And then I feel guilty for not being a good friend. This solidifies my idiocy.

I am in one of those moods where if I can't say anything nice, then I shouldn't say anything at all. So, this will end my rantings for this morning. I have to leave work early, so I can swap cars with my friend because her 7 year old isn't big enough to ride in the car without a booster seat and 3 car seats don't fit in my Subaru. So, aside from driving a mini-van around, pretending to be a soccer mom tomorrow, paying for/feeding/changing diapers/cleaning up after these munchkins, I will have slight anxiety about someone driving my car around, and me being responsible for her's.

I would never choose to have 3+ kids. And I may never make it to one... and that might just be alright with me.

Uh huh!

Yes, I went out last night. I got home at 3ish, husband called at 430 on his lunch break, alarm clock went off at 6. Eeewwww! I could have slept until noon. I had an oatmeal cookie on the rocks, a Tom collins, a shot of Patron for my friend's birthday and then an Irish Car bomb for her birthday also. Hence, a little shaky at work today but otherwise well. It's good to be young.

So, it's almost the weekend but I'm dreading it as I will have my friend's 3 kids friday evening until sunday afternoon, ages 2, 5 and 7. And they are screamers, not very well behaved and pretty much undisciplined. I haven't had them since last december and by sunday I wanted to ring their little necks, because when I do discipline them (verbally), they stare at me stone faced and don't react or respond. They don't answer my questions or cry, and that makes me want to inflict physical violence on them. But, we'll see how it goes... Luckily it will be nice weather and they have soccer games all saturday morning, so it's not like they will be stuck in the house like they were in december. Sad thing is, is that my friend (the mother of these kids) is pregnant again and her husband is in the military and he has an older kid who luckily is staying at his grandma's house this weekend. So, by december they will have 5 children and I'm the only friend who's close enough and nice enough to take her kids for her when shse needs a break. But 5 kids?!?!?!? that's crazy! Not very fair either, as I seem to not be able to make one, yet!

Ok, so there most likely will not be any posts after tomorrow morning. Please think peaceful thoughts for me this weekend, pray that I don't hurt any munchkins or pull my hair out, or lose my voice-temper-mind and desire to have peanuts of my own.

buhbyelalas!

wednesday

I was going to go out last night but fell asleep. I'm bored and have the "blahs" and currently instead of doing actual work here at work, I am planning a vacation to california for Dan and my 5 yr anniversary. I was hoping we'd just drive down and hit all the amusement parks but now in order to have time to at least hit Magic mountain and Disneyland parks, we are looking into flying. Which kind of sucks because I wanted to drive back up the coast and hit Hearst Castle too. Oh well, what can you do with limited time and budget. Plus, my brother and wife want to see us and Dan wants to see/stay with his bestfriend. 4 days with a lot to pack into it, especially when his bestfriend won't go to amusement parks. Irritating!!!

So, hopefully my "blahs" will go away before I go out this evening... husbandless. Weird! have a nice wednesday!

I'm ok...

I actually slept like a baby last night. It was my first night alone, in my new house, with puppy to take out in the middle of the night, while Dan worked his first night shift. It went well, I didn't freak myself out. I actually lit a bunch of candles picked up the house a little, read a little, and fell fast asleep. A phone call at his first break of the night, is perfect because it is just the right time to take Baron out for a couple minutes, so there won't be any accidents when I get up in the morning.

I woke up peacefully, got ready on my own time line, left early Just in time to meet an accident that had the road blocked off for over two hours so I detoured and my usual hour drive was extended to two hours. Luckily I left early and was only 15 minutes late to work. But I think I will survive this night thing. Wednesday will be weird since that is the night I go out and will be coming home to an empty house, and being alone. But the dog will be happy to see me. And I must say it is so nice to have a creature be so happy and excited to see me. Plus, my cats have become super affectionate, as soon as I sit down on the couch they are either on my lap or chest or wrapped around my shoulders. Oh, love!

Ok, that is my Tuesday morning rambling.

ppplllbbbtrtttt

Good morning Portland. Up at 5am, outta the house at 6am, at work by 7am, it's just past 8am and no rectification of my mortification due to the embarrassment of yesterday's foot-in-mouth mess. Oh well, what can you do?

Bad sunken in feeling today, but at least I am wearing a new dress and feel slightly cute today. Urban Outfitters, NW 23rd yesterday after work: now I am the happy owner of a dress that is really just a dark heather gray Hooded sweatshirt cut A-line and longer with no hem at the bottom. Plus the favorite little kangaroo pocket that complete's the hooded sweatshirt look. Got on some dark purple tights and little black shoes, and just feeling like a kid with lots of grown-up work to do today. But oh-so-comfy!

Very pleased that my friend and camera will be home Wednesday/Thursday... I can't remember which day exactly but it will be sometime next week. Which is good, can't wait! It's strange, I think I'd hardly go out if it weren't for her. It has been nice to spend so much time at home this last couple of weeks though, and now I've gone and thrown a dog into the equation which will mean I do have to be responsible to get home or pay the consequences.

Okay this weekend is full of to-do! Cleaning, yard sale tomorrow, and then on Sunday a little family trip up the clackamas river to mount hood and back down the Columbia gorge to the other side of the river to hit Mary Hill, Stone Henge, and Underwood then back across to hit Multnomah, Oneonta, Horsetail, and a bunch of the other little falls. This is a yearly thing we do and it is usually so much fun but it is supposed to rain which we have never had that before. Strange... We'll see, it still would be fun.

Okay hope you all have a fun and safe weekend.

Terrible knack for sticking my foot in my mouth!

Yes, I'm one of those people that has a mind that runs a thousand things a minute and talk really fast about nothing at all, and most of all when I'm being sarcastic or (think i'm being)witty, I say something that I know exactly what I mean in my head but comes off as partial and not at all what I'm meaning.

Yep, I did it again! The party involved will either think it's funny (which it kinda is) or the other party referenced to, will think I'm a catty brat. Not my intention, as humility fails and greater humility hobbles me at the knees. I'm wracked with embarrassment. This is the reason why I love blogs where you can erase your own comments. I re-read what I wrote to a blog acquaintance regarding appearances and fashion.

Intention: As long as you feel you look good then you've won, and your husband should affirm how attractive you are!

Nope, as I re-read, this is how it sounded to me from my own words: I couldn't say if I'm attractive because I'm really critical of myself, but your husband can tell you if I am attractive.

Yeah, I'm an idiot. I think I'll--- um... stop commenting on any and every blog until I can think before I speak and re-read before I publish. Yes, stabbing a pencil into my eye as I write.

rain rain rain

loving it! although it was so heavy last night I thought the gutters were going to rip off the house. What a racket! But I opened the windows and to hear the rain pouring on the huge trees and dripping through the leaves, geez I'm loving this house, and my puppy and crazy cats. It has been such a peaceful week. I'm wondering when the raucous is going to start.

Going out tonight but won't be getting to the BR until after 9 or 930. It is kind of a busy day and there is much to do after work. okay, enjoy the weather today!

news! news!

Dan and i have increased the numbers of our household... by one puppy! Friday evening we purchased a 9 week old Hound/black lab mix. He is adorable, so far gets along with the cats, and is fairly housebroken. His name is Baron short for Baron Von Frankenstein. As our kitties are Froedrick and Igor. Baron, is mostly balck with hound markings on his little tan chin and feet. And will probably end up being about an 80lb, waist high protector of the thunderdomain! I lerv him and ol' Dan has been all smiles all weekend! He has always wanted a dog of his own. That's my weekend cleaning and training the pup, and just being lazy at home keeping the pooch company. It was very nice.

How are all of you?

friday

I have this terrible desire to go school clothes shopping... but I'm not in school.
I want new pants, a fitted black turtle neck, some black leather pants--- you know just some nice separates for fall. I am trying to dress a little more grown up as I used to be quite small and could get away with it, but 30 lbs more doesn't look so hot in the same baby t's, and short skirts. Plus, I'm not 22 anymore, which I still find a little shocking. 28 will be here before I know it, and that is just strange because I still feel so immature and directionless. This is my usual chatter, it is shaping up to be a beautiful friday.

I woke up to fog and crisp coldness. Stars twinkling and as I drove to work a brilliant sunrise. We definitely live in one of the most beautiful places in the world and lovely enough, it changes every hour to something else pretty. *Sigh* happiness.

Wonderful weekend

Dan and I went to Cannon beach/Seaside played arcade games and went on the tilt-o-whirl until we were ill. We scavenged the beach for shells and were quite pleased with our boodle. We played in the waves, went through all the little shops, got a couple christmas presents out of the way, went hiking up to some falls south of Tillamook and drove down the coast a ways. Ate lunch at the Pelican Brew Pub in Pacific city. Had the best, Artichoke, Asagio and spinach dip I've ever had and a great burger with beer. All in all just a wonderful weekend with the huz. This might be a boring entry but it's nice to share nice things about relationships when you hear of so much crap in this world, and people bashing their significant others. It's not going to happen from me.

vacation from myself! woo hoo.

A couple of my friends are going to be off on vacations around the world the next few weeks. And particularly they are the friends that I go "out" with the most. so, this gives me time to stay at home, I'm so excited!!!!! I'm actually going to try and change some drinking, eating, exercising and sleeping habits and see if I can't drop the 10 lbs that I'd like to drop. I'm very ecstatic! I already started the whole eating and exercising thing this week. But sleep? No! No rest for the wicked. That's another thing... my attitude has been very poor lately. Probably contributed by the lack of sleep thing, and just plain no "down-time". So, okay I'll probably be out tonight, but not tomorrow, sunday, or at all the next 2 weeks. You will have to interact with me via LJ or text messaging. I love it! It will be a vacation from myself! woo hoo.

I wore my pajamas to the BR...

Yes, it was a pajama party at the old Boiler room. Much fun was had! I ate 6 meals yesterday, I can tell today. I've had very little sleep this week but am oh so happy. It is thursday, I'm already on my second pop of the day and the day is flying by. Do you think there will be any hotel rooms available at Cannon Beach on sunday night? I'm thinking about a last minute overnight trip before the huz starts his new job... And it is supposed to be nice weather. Oh I want to leave right now!

yummy stout

oh, thats all. Rockbottom brewery Morrison Stout. And the titan toothpicks. delish! It was the hubzands last day at work/landscaping yesterday and for his celebratory dinner he wanted the rockbottom. It was worth it, we got all silly on beers and sappy at eachother and then BR to watch Donnie Darko. All in all, a wonderful evening. Nothing better than good food and fun company. In a few weeks the life we know will change... night shift for him and day shift for me with a couple hours between to have dinner together. Weird! I definitely need a big dog and a fenced in backyard. I freaked myself out lastnight and he was home, this is not a good sign.